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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28835166">Stay With Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/1f_this_be_madness/pseuds/1f_this_be_madness'>1f_this_be_madness</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Mending The Broken Things [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe - Police, Benny Lafitte &amp; Dean Winchester Friendship, Benny Lafitte Takes Care of Dean Winchester, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Bit drafty but we love it, Crying, Dean Benny (or BeanDenny as said by Ty) is canon, Dean Winchester is Bad at Feelings, Dean the Disaster Bi, Dom/sub Undertones, First Time, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Inspired by Ladyhawke (1985), John Winchester is/was an asshole, M/M, Movie Night, Past Character Death, Police Officer Benny Lafitte, Police Officer Dean Winchester, Shameless Smut, Swearing, Tender Sex, Tenderness, but he tries</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:22:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,510</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28835166</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/1f_this_be_madness/pseuds/1f_this_be_madness</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When Dean meets Benny, he's a cop who focuses on being a cop. Watches out for his family above everything else. Including himself.</p><p>But if Benny Lafitte has his way, he's going to change that. </p><p>Because far as he believes and sees, Dean Winchester deserves the world.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Benny Lafitte &amp; Dean Winchester, Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Mending The Broken Things [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1158431</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Benny saw something in Dean the minute they met. Dean didn't even register that he was flirting. Totally oblivious.</p><p>Benny is unapologetically attracted to Dean instantly when they meet. Benny, walking in; sees Dean. "They really allow a beau fella like yourself t' run this place?"</p><p>Dean, busy with work, missing the flirting: "You're, uh, Benny. Right?"</p><p>With a hand outstretched to shake and a slow smile tugging at his mouth "Yeah, Benny. Lafitte. Pleasha t'meet you."</p><p>When they get assigned as partners, Benny says "damn I hit the jackpot! Everybody's gonna wanta ride in our squad car 'cus a you."</p><p>Dean's brain's like "OFBWOVNEJGD wtf does THAT mean??"</p><p>"Heya, sweetheart," Benny says to him, and "How're ya doing, darlin'?" </p><p>Dean's first reaction to that is "UHHHH YOUSAIDWHAT??" Benny calls him that when they meet, it seems to be automatic, and Dean's like "the fuck is this, but I... I dig it"</p><p>He does it enough that Dean knows something's bothering Benny if he doesn't call him that. </p><p>Benny says "Hey, darlin'" Dean gets flustered and then ducks his head with a sweet smile. </p><p>Benny says "...Hey"</p><p>Dean, blinking, instantly on alert "... WHAT'S WRONG?"</p><p>And he gets this proud little smirk first time he calls Benny a pet name in kind.</p><p>Benny is strolling up to the squad car "hey, darlin', g'mornin."</p><p>Dean responds "Hey what's up, babe?" Benny almost crashes into the car instead of getting the door open and Dean starts smirking.</p><p>Dean ducks into the driver's seat as Benny freezes and now he's laughing, a big gasping laugh that doubles him over in the seat of the squad car. </p><p>Benny is trying to act dignified as he smooths his jacket and jerks open the passenger door, but inside he's basically squealing. He clears his throat. "Oh-ho," he is trying to laugh it off but is genuinely frazzled. "Ya gettin' friendly now?"</p><p>Dean shrugs like it isn't the big deal that it is. "What's it people say? Turnabout's fair play, right?"</p><p>Benny, raising an eyebrow, trying to act casual "Uh-huh..."</p><p>Dean looks over, still grinning. "Are you BLUSHING, Benny, babe?"</p><p>Benny, dying a little (or a lot) inside, humphs and slouches in his seat. "Shuddup"</p><p>Dean doesn't intend to but he shakes his head over the blush and says "Damn, most of the time you're sexy but right now you're just - adorable" And then his eyes widen and he about drops his head into the steering wheel as Benny's lips begin to twitch.</p><p>"You think I'm sexy?" He drawls.</p><p>"I mean - I - you - objectively, yeah," Dean is bumbling over words now, trying to start the car and get the hell out of this conversation.</p><p>It's banter, he tells himself. Just... really flirty banter. </p><p>***</p><p>Not long after Benny's taken up his job as Deputy, partnering up with Dean. Dean starts thinking about Benny a lot more than he was expecting to, and at one point he ends up going to a bar... not really realizing that he's actually keeping an eye out for Benny even though he has no reason to believe that he'll be there. But he is. And Benny swaggers over with "Well, now... Dean Winchester. Wasn't expectin' you to be here."</p><p>Dean can't help the way his heart nearly jumps out of him and he ducks his head to subconsciously hide a big smile. "Yeah, well, sometimes a long day calls for a drink. Or two. Or five." Benny chuckles at that. Dean waves a hand at the seat beside him. "...Join me?" He asks. The uncertainty crackling under the bravado hits Benny in the heart, and he offers Dean a soft smile. </p><p>"Of course, sha."</p><p>They just chat for a while, enjoy each other's company, then they split for the night. Slowly but surely it becomes the norm. Dean will have moments where he doesn't initially spot Benny and he feels this sickness in the pit of his stomach, but Benny comes up right behind him, leans by his ear and says, "Come on, now. You think I'd stand you up, sha?" It's the first time he focuses on Benny calling him that, but he doesn't exactly get the intent.</p><p>Dean beams bright as he turns around and says, gesturing to the drink in the other's hand, "No, but I definitely think you started the party without me!"</p><p>Soon Dean starts looking forward to when they hang out, but he doesn't really analyze why. He wouldn't. It's just him and his buddy, out for drinks... But then they start having one-on-one times together, drinking long after the bar's starting to close and most of the people have left. They talk about their lives, though Dean doesn't divulge much about his past. But Benny doesn't question it.</p><p>And one day, when Dean's looking for Benny, as in actively searching for him, he's suddenly pulled aside by the man in question.</p><p>"Level with me— I know you're good at that... You do know... y'could always invite me somewhere...? Preferably some place that doesn't smell like a backstreet alleyway ev'ry Tuesd'y. I wouldn't mind that." He sees Dean stiffen and he cocks his head. "Or— mebbe I misread th' situation...?"</p><p>But Dean... he can't immediately reject it. He's honestly been having WAY too much fun and this... He doesn't feel the need to run. Not from Benny. So, everything be damned, he takes a chance. Though... baby steps.</p><p>Dean licks his lips, turning his head to check to see if they're still alone. He doesn't look back yet when he says, "There's this burger joint down the block I heard about. You should check it out. Heard they have amazing sloppy joes on Wednesdays......"</p><p>Benny's face softens. He nods once. "Wednesday it is then."</p><p>Haven't had one of those in years...you're gonna make me nostalgic. How the bun gets soggy if you hold it too long so you gotta basically stuff, and Dean's getting the sauce all over his face and he's closing his eyes and groaning because "DAMN these things are good" and Benny smiles and leans over as Dean has sauce dripping down his chin off the corner of his lip and says "y' got something there, sha" and casually dabs it off.</p><p>Dean nearly chokes as a result, poor guy. He realizes there's some significance behind whatever "sha" is in that moment - First times he hears it, he reasons it must be the accent. Second time, he HEARD that. He thought it was short for "sure 'nuff" and now he's just like ...okay what - </p><p>Dean nods sharply and grabs a glass to gulp from, asking "What's sha mean?"</p><p>Benny just chuckles. "It means what you want it to mean."<br/>
That's to say if Dean's not interested, then he doesn't need to worry about what it means.</p><p>Dean lifts his eyebrows. "Oh you're gonna be cryptic now, huh? Seriously, man. What..." He wipes his hands, leaning elbows on the table and closing one fist around the napkin. Tries to joke, offering a chuckle "You calling me a shithead or something?" </p><p>At this, Benny guffaws. "Now why wouldja think /that/? I mean– considerin' where we are and considerin' I just wiped your face for ya," he squints at him, almost cheeky as his voice drops, "what do /you/ think it means...? And here I thought /you/ invited /me/…." </p><p>Dean rubs the back of his neck as he clears his throat. "Don't know, dude. I mean ya already call me sweetheart and darlin', so."</p><p>Benny folds his arms on the table and leans against them, slightly closer to Dean now. "If it bothers ya, I could call it quits— we pretend this never happened." He tilts his head a bit. "Or... see where it goes." His smile widens. "But from what I gathe', you don't mind my callin' y' that…"</p><p>Dean blinks, clears his throat. "Nah, I don't mind," he mumbles, focusing hard on willing his face not to change even as his stomach swoops. From the sloppy joe, yeah. That's gotta be what it is….</p><p>"Alright, then," Benny replies. "Whatever this is..." He shrugs, eyes trained on Dean's face. "...we go slow. You have my word."</p><p>Dean inhales. Slow. He isn't usually one for slow, but Benny saying that soothes a little something in his chest. Makes his heart flutter, actually. And he doesn't think it's the food this time. He feels... excited about wherever this is going. Doesn't know what to say exactly, so he smiles.</p><p>Benny chuckles at the sight. Dean Winchester, so content after eating his second sloppy joe, was striking. To anyone else he'd be just some guy that so happened to be the town sheriff. But not to Benny. Even if this isn't to work out in the long-run, in this moment, this instance, that smile is his alone.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Finally, finally Benny is pretty upfront with, and after, all the flirting. The sloppy joes, the long talks… One day he decides to take the bull by the horns.</p><p>He's just beaming, and tells Dean "I gotta say somethin', sha, and I ain't about t' mince words when you’re right here'n front'a me lookin' like that."</p><p>Dean's like "Benny, look,"</p><p>Benny lifts a hand. "You don't gotta say anything if it's too tough, jus' listen." He lifts his chin and settles his shoulders, eyes sparkling underneath the brim of his cap. “Lookit, Dean, I just gotta tell ya that I'm into you. I wanna stay in, or take ya out, whatever you want. Whatever you're comfortable with. An' if not, just lemme know an' full stop, I promise."</p><p>"Benny, I..." Dean swallows, licking his lips. He's floored. Benny has such an open and warm, loving look on his face. Dean doesn't know what to friggin do, but he doesn't want Benny to quit looking at him like this. </p><p>"Ah, sweetheart," Benny starts before he can second guess his choice of words. "I told you, nothin' needs t'be said." He offers a gentle yet hesitant smile, then holds out a hand. "Iffin ya figure it's somethin' worth tryin', well..." He raises his hand just a tad for emphasis. "But if not, I won't be offended."</p><p>Dean's chest clenches and flares with pain at the hesitancy in Benny's face after his offer. At the earnest way he holds out a hand. Fuck. He thinks back on all the times in life he's seen someone or wanted to say something, but thought of his place and the words of his father. Of being a man. Yet Benny is no less manly in any way shape or form for this. For his honesty, or for liking Dean and being willing, being able to say it.</p><p>Besides, John isn't here now. He can't force Dean into his box, into the mould of a perfect little soldier. He thinks of Sam, telling him “I want you to be happy, Dean" and how this feeling he gets with Benny, how it makes him...well. gives him hope that he can be happy.</p><p>Benny waits patiently, watching Dean's cogs work. He tilts his head at the sight, a bit of pride blooming in his chest. He almost laughs because it's a bit odd to be proud of seeing someone thinking. Even if Dean doesn't feel the same, he reflects, he's fine with that... regardless, he knows he'll still have a friend. So as much as his heart would dread the rejection, he has nothing to worry about. Of course, it'll take a bit longer to stop himself from stealing looks every now and again.</p><p>"It's okay, sha" slips from him, a gentle whisper of reassurance, after a moment. He doesn't press. He just waits.</p><p>Dean squeezes his eyes shut for a moment and works his lips before throwing caution to the winds and moving forward, into Benny's space. He looks into those eyes and his own flicker over strong chest and arms before "Yeah, Benny," he almost whispers. </p><p>Benny's eyebrow quirks as his lips twitch. "'Yeah', what, Dean darlin'?"</p><p>Dean's heart skips a beat. "Yeah, you can take me out. Or -" reaching out and curling his hand around the nape of Benny's neck, rubbing over the skin and bristles of hair with the tips of his fingers, heart leaping into his throat at the chance he's taking with his next words. "I c'n take you places you've never been before." His lip trembles as he speaks thus, breaths coming sharply at all the feelings he has, that he dares.</p><p>Benny's chest immediately feels infinitely lighter and a chuckle begins to rumble within it. "Promise...?" He flashes his teeth, eyes darting across the other man's face, his outstretched hand moving to gingerly rest on Dean's upper arm. "Well... I'm hold'n ya to that, chief."</p><p>Dean's lip curls in an answering smirk as he nods. "Deal." And then, through with all the ginger touches, he tugs on Benny's nape and pulls the other man into him, wrapping both arms around in a tight hug. His "c'mere" is muffled as he buries his head next to Benny's and practically holds his breath.</p><p>***</p><p>They are alone at the office one day when they only have paperwork to catch up on. Instead of sharing space in separate chairs, they are cuddling - because no one is there to judge Dean for sitting on his boyfriend's lap. </p><p>They spread out paperwork on the floor and Dean leans on Benny's shoulder as Benny pats his hair. Dean is just... able to relax. When it's just him and Benny...no dad expectations anymore, nobody else to see how he really wants to be taken care of and held for once, not having to be the protector - being WILLING, of course, as always - but on equal footing. Because Benny has his back in the same way he's got Benny's. Benny gently presses kisses to Dean's forehead and temples and cheeks, and Dean nuzzles into the underside of Benny's bearded jaw.</p><p>Sam visits and Dean and Benny scramble to be a respectable distance apart. But Sam sees Dean looking all disheveled, and his face just screams "I don't wanna know." Meanwhile poor man just wants a thirty minute long hug from his boyfriend. Or more than a hug….</p><p>Dean is just genuinely GIDDY when he's with Benny. They're on the floor with the paperwork and Benny's like "why ah we down here?" </p><p>Dean feels so jittery and grinny that he's like "I, uh, just 'cause."</p><p>Benny softly smiles at him and then he shoves Dean's shoulder as Dean automatically leans into him, wrapping his arms around Benny's shoulders. Dean sleeps better now, even though he falls asleep in places that arent comfortable. Like said floor, his office chair, etc. Benny just gives him his coat, and after a while brings a blanket and pillow. </p><p>They're on the blanket and pillow and Dean's grinning at him and wiggling his brows in a certain way, Benny's like "Hey now, less not defile th' office, darlin'."</p><p>"What's a little make out gonna do to the floor? Get our seven minutes in. And if anything else happens -"</p><p>"See that's why we oughta head outta here. I don't guar'ntee stoppin' at seven minutes." He legitimately bares his teeth as he grins and all Dean's blood rushes south. </p><p>His voice is a husky croak as he looks at Benny. "You promise?"</p><p>Benny's eyes grow wide.</p><p>They don't even make it home, just -barely!- get to Dean's car for a makeout session.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Aaaand smut ensues below - long chapter!<br/>This chapter is the reason for our rating, lol</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dean is so excited to have Benny around for a movie night.

</p><p>It's after a really tough case they'd solved and he suggests going to his place before even thinking about it. He freezes comically for a second, but the offer has been made, and besides, they're in the mood to celebrate. 

</p><p>Benny has the best idea for a film to see. He has mentioned Ladyhawke, as an unapologetic romantic, and Dean - THE movie buff - hasn't seen it. So with a wink, recalling that conversation where Dean had said his biggest rule with his brother Sam was always 'no chick flick moments', Benny now drawls "I know just th' one. I'll bring it over."</p><p>Dean's comment in the first thirty seconds: "wow Ferris got the day off to shoot this, huh?" </p><p>Benny rolls his eyes and huffs out a chuckle.</p><p>When Dean first sees the scene where the two protagonists shapeshift, change into themselves, and they can almost touch for that split second, he doesn't realize it but he's grabbing onto Benny's arm and leaning on the edge of his seat. And when they don't, can't, he throws his arms up with a "dammit!"</p><p>Benny rubs Dean's back when he's frustrated by them not being able to touch.</p><p>Dean starts muttering under his breath about the bishop being a rat bastard, and then is grunting and automatically moves as if to help Philippe try to pull the captain as a wolf out of the freezing water. </p><p>He has a hard time when Isabeau is screaming from pain when the father has to pull that arrow quarrel out of her chest… And when Philippe learns about the curse and stuff, Dean's sorta breathless and he just slowly leans back on Benny, who just lifts his arm up and gently wraps it around to the front of Dean's chest.</p><p>Benny presses a kiss to the back of Dean's head while they're watching, and then Dean is not sure when he had shifted his body to nestle against Benny's side, or when his face has come to rest against Benny's neck and upper chest, but he's nuzzling into Benny's skin later on. He's pressing kisses to the side of Benny's neck but his breath huffs out as he says he's still watching. </p><p>He buries his nose in Dean's hair when Navarre realizes that Isabeau is okay and human. And Dean's throat is working as he buries his head in Benny's shoulder at that moment too.</p><p>Benny tells Dean he's like Isabeau because he inspires devotion and Dean can't handle that because he thought he'd be more like brooding captain Etienne or even the bishop, with a darkness in him. And then Benny's like "awright sha, well, whaddya wanna be? The Mouse?" </p><p>Dean blurts out "you sonofabitch" but he starts laughing.</p><p>And then when Isabeau's potentially about to die, Dean's holding onto Benny's arm for dear life, and Benny just brings his other arm around so he can hug him and be there for him. Even though he's been watching so intensely the ENTIRE movie, during the reunion scene, Dean's not even focused on that anymore. Just on Benny. A chuckle rumbles in Benny's chest. "Sweetheart, ya ain't watchin' the movie…"</p><p>Dean flushes, eyes so bright as he licks his lips. "You're too good to miss," he bursts out before realizing what he's saying. </p><p>But Benny just smiles slowly at him, lips curving and eyes twinkling. Tilts his head, half-lidded eyes on Dean. "Oh, what's all this now... I'm more entertainin'...?" he lows. He cracks a toothy smile. "I c'n't tease— been watchin' you watch this for th' past hour."</p><p>Dean's breath catches. What - "Really?" And he can't help wondering why, even as his eyes have been drawn to Benny and he can't seem to look away.</p><p>"Darlin', I've seen this movie plenty-a times on my own..." He reaches his hand up and brushes Dean's cheek with the side of his index. "Truth be told... I always look at'chu."</p><p>"Ah, hell, Benny..." Dean breathes out, and he cannot stop the twitch of his lips, the way his eyes close as he aches at that touch and those words, for completely different reasons. How he's been told he's got such a pretty face, and crashing in with that is the /man up, son!/ barking in his father's voice. He hates how that still sits. Usually it doesn't affect how Benny talks about him, because he knows - he thinks he knows - what Benny means. </p><p>But he barks out a little laugh now. "Because I'm pretty?" He asks.</p><p>At this, Benny's visage flickers for a moment. Then, with a few whispered words, he ushers Dean to sit up a bit so he could face him. His eyes dart across the man's countenance, watching that brow slowly knit together in unease, and he puffs out a long sigh. "Sweetheart— Dean..." He steals one more glance and then offers a gentle grin. "...ya must be joshin'...... To me... you're breathtaking." He shakes his head. "Ev'ry day I look atcha an' I consider myself a lucky man— I'm in th' presence of Dean Winchester," he croons. "You're brighte' than th' stars. Believe me or not, but you're /exhilarating/... an' ev'ry othe' synonym you'd like."</p><p>Dean's lips tremble as his eyes flicker over Benny's face, how open and honest it is. He'd joke, say Benny's messing, but he knows he isn't. He knows - for whatever damned reason - Benny actually legitimately believes all that. Feels that way. "Benny," his voice is rough now as he wets his lips and claps a hand on Benny's shoulder, thumb rubbing over the cloth of his shirt and the skin beneath. He shakes his head, huffs out air. Tone is nearly a mumble "I'm the lucky one here."</p><p>Benny rolls his neck, chortling. "Aw, don't put'cha self down like that, sha."</p><p>Dean opens his mouth, to deny it, or to crack a joke - or he would, to anybody else. He'd shrug that off. But this is Benny, who knows him so well. Who knows... And Dean feels this sharpness, something shoot through him like a bullet graze, but whatever it is, he's nodding, and then moving, and he's got his hand to Benny's neck and his lips to his and he's muttering "thank you" into Benny's mouth but probably isn't intelligible as it's mid- kiss, desperate, resounding.</p><p>Benny meets him halfway, careful as he raises his hands to hold Dean's face. He doesn't push, just accepts and gives in turn what Dean provides. His heart beats like a thundering drum against his ribs, the pulse just as prominent beneath Dean's fingertips, occasionally seeming to skip as he draws in a deep breath through his nose, taking in Dean's smell.</p><p>Dean lets out a small sound as his lips capture Benny's and then release to nip just slightly at the lower lip with his teeth. Benny's hands brace him, ground him, as he drives with all he can give, fingers stroking and then sinking into the bristles of Benny's beard as he tilts his head to keep kissing, shifting his body so he's pressed to Benny on the couch, on his knees.</p><p>Benny is gentle, tentative in placing his hands on Dean's shoulder blades, keeping his arms loose so he doesn't make him feel trapped. They part to breathe and he dares a kiss to the corner of Dean's mouth and then to his nose, treating each spot as delicately as any treasure, his eyes closed despite how much he wants to look. But he knows Dean, and he promised to be slow... so he gives him that little bit of privacy.</p><p>Dean groans with it, he feels something shake, shatter within at Benny's little touches, at those tender kisses he gives with his eyes closed. He's taking himself at his word, to go slow, and Dean pulls him in, hand going to hold the back of Benny's head as he kisses his cheek, nuzzling his jaw and face into Benny's beard and neck, pressing kisses along.</p><p>Benny's brows press together a bit at the breathiness of Dean's tone, leaning into him lightly. A hand passes over to the other's arm, giving it a slightly firm squeeze, to assure Dean that he's there. "Talk t' me, darlin'..." he growls lowly when Dean rolls his cheek gingerly against his own. "Mm? Penny... for ya thoughts…"</p><p>"Oh, god," Dean gasps out, burying his face into Benny's neck and rocking against him now. He clenches his teeth, barely holding back a whimper. How the hell is he like this, already? Something...about Benny. Trying to move himself into Benny's touch as best he can, Dean doesn't know what else needs saying. He just wants Benny to keep holding on to him. "Benny, please…"</p><p>Benny's heart jerks like it's been snagged on a branch, and his eyes promptly snap open— which he internally curses himself for— then immediately a hand goes up to cup Dean's face. He swipes his thumb across the freckled skin. "What is it, baby...?" he murmurs tenderly, brows scrunched in concern. "I'm here, Dean... It's okay," he assures, "Tell me what'cha want…"</p><p>Dean's breath catches and it feels as though his heart stops. He sways, eyes opening as he is still pressing himself to Benny and feeling like a teenager, just wanting to get his rocks off, but no. He wants to be touched, he needs to be held. "Touch me," his voice is low, a rough whisper. "Just - hold me, I -" it's too much to look at him, so Dean closes his eyes again as he vocalizes "...I need you."</p><p>Benny lets out a short wisp of air, leaning his cheek against the side of Dean's head, dropping his hand to brush at the man's shoulder. "Alright," he says. Whatever Dean needs, he'll give it. He has to try. And like second nature, he knows words are too much right now, so he supplies his own. "I'll move m' hands slow... you tell me now if you don't want me t' go anywhere." When he receives a lax nod in response, he steels himself and starts from Dean's upper back, exploring the muscles over the shirt, moving his hands in small circles and inching cautiously.</p><p>"Unh," Dean groans, burying his head in Benny's shoulder as he feels the other's strong yet cautious touches. "Good," he gasps, lips pressed to and then releasing from the hollow of Benny's throat as he turns his head to kiss there, trailing his tongue a little. "That feels good."</p><p>He's trying so hard not to do too much, Benny. Meanwhile Dean's falling into a kind of haze already because he just wants to be held and Benny is being so good to him.</p><p>The broader man pinches and rolls his lips together nervously, peering through half-lidded eyes— although completely unintentional— as though an attempt to keep to his previous promise of giving Dean his privacy... but of course he also needs to see what he is doing. His calloused hands ghost across the fabric, with the barest of wavering in his fingers, travelling to Dean's upper to forearms and back again. Where the shirt ends, he senses goosebumps, and it's an instantaneous reaction when his own arms flare up. He moves south, parallel to Dean's shoulder blades, merely grazing the indentations of his waist just barely when Dean jolts under his touch. He retracts his hands immediately, apology on his tongue.</p><p>Dean feels like he is floating in a haze that's only grounded in the pressure of Benny's hands, his gentle soothing touch. Dean's eyes prickle as feeling builds and builds within, as he shivers with it, and then jerks, jolting in desire when that careful grasp only barely grazes his waist and tops of his hips. Clutching Benny now, "yes," he whispers, mouth falling open as he moans, unable to stop himself from moving into the touch that instantly retreats. "Stay with me," he isn't fully aware of the words he uses, only wanting Benny to know that he wants that touch.</p><p>The rawness of Dean's voice practically tears Benny asunder. He can't help the way his eyes darken when Dean moans near his ear, causing him to gulp a few times to steady himself and focus. He nods, understanding, and replaces his hands. Dean shivers then melts at his touch, and his heart cries in jubilation. "Alright, sweetheart..." he rasps, watching now more intently as he moves his hands once more, further down. "...tell me if y'want me t' stop..." With that warning, he reaches the top of Dean's pants, inhales sharply, then dips his fingers a bit shallow past the fabric. </p><p>Dean gasps, panting now as Benny's fingertips - still gentle and slow - move under the fabric of his pants and at the edge of his underwear. And he doesn't have it in him to stop, he doesn't want Benny to stop. He has no idea where this will go, but he is willing to go along with it.</p><p>And Benny, as he touches Dean with swiping strokes, feels such a strong burst of affection in his chest. There is desire too, but the way Dean settles into him, the way he throbs and gasps and keens, it makes Benny feel so many wonderful things he cannot quantify them all.</p><p>Resting his chin lightly against his shoulder, Benny supports Dean's body with his arms, turning to whisper once more that he's moving and offering him warm reassurance as he finally ventures past the elastic band. Dean holds his breath and Benny doesn't realize he does the same. Spreading his fingers, boldly, with both hands, he grabs hold of Dean's plump ass and squeezes.</p><p>Dean shudders and freezes, expelling a gasping cry of pleasure and feeling himself throbbing with it. The way Benny's fingers feel... The way he grips tight, but holds his breath like this is a precious moment, it all makes Dean squeeze his eyes shut. He doesn't realize how hard he is, or that he's shaking, or thrusting himself into Benny's body and hands, but "Oh, Benny, don't stop," he manages. "God your hands feel so good."</p><p>A tremoring grunt expels through Benny's nose, deep and heavy as it reverberates in his chest. He wills himself to cease the involuntary jerking of his hips to meet Dean's movement, releasing a low growl. Instead he centers on his hands again, gentle in releasing but firm in grasping, gasping silently at the noises he received, mystified. He presses closer to Dean for a moment, whispering into his caramel brown locks, eyelashes fluttering briefly: "Dean... I— please let me see you..." For emphasis, he alternates his hands, one now massaging; and the other reaching further underneath, lifting and supporting him as he pulls him more flush to his lap, and then grazing his nails along the skin as he draws it back up. A pain stabs through his heart, a struggling and lingering feeling, as his mind begins to muddle solely with thoughts of Dean's plush skin and his dessert-sweet scent. Pie, his mind supplies, but it's not what is important. Dean... He wants him to feel good— to feel safe... wanted. His voice is husky and dry as he punctuates, "I wanna see ya…"</p><p>Dean feels Benny's strength, and is in awe of how he holds him so carefully, so securely. Even in the burst of feeling, he remains in awe, and gulps, registering what Benny had asked. To see him.</p><p>Dean nods, licks his lips, chin tucking as he squeezes his eyes shut. Benny wants to see him, and he's making him feel so damn good with his careful touches. Yeah, okay. </p><p>With a swift movement, Dean reaches up and grabs the collar of his t-shirt, tugging it over his head. </p><p>Benny's throat clicks as he marvels at Dean through his lashes. "Oh, sha..." he remarks breathily at the spectacle of a man before him, retreating the hand that had been massaging to trail past his waist again. He pauses to clutch at the skin, nails slightly biting, before he lets go and continues upwards. Wetting his lips, he ducks his head in an attempt to catch sight of Dean's face. /I want to see you/, his being screams, enthralled as he presses a small kiss to one cheekbone. Pretty— that didn't even begin to cover the adjectives coursing through Benny's mind. Uttering a soft sound, his hand hesitates for a moment, then proceeds, fingers ghosting across Dean's subtly flushing chest and over one of his pert nipples. "Ya so beautiful, sweetheart..." he insists, feeling the immediate objection behind Dean's lips, silencing it by placing his own to the corner of his mouth and giving his ass another strong squeeze.</p><p>Dean lets out an almost-whimper, throwing his head back after Benny kisses his cheek and mouth and squeezes him. His chest heaves as the places where Benny's lips touched, where his nails scraped, feel lit up so so bright. He shivers at the lightest stroke Benny sends across his nipple and gasps again, thrusting himself towards those tender calloused hands.</p><p>Following every movement like a magnet, Benny captures Dean's neck with a fervid kiss— beard tickling along the skin— and then a bite, though he doesn't dare break any skin. Hungry desire seems to seep off of him, through his whole body, his pores. "Nhnf... darlin'," he groans, pulling back, clearing his throat so he can stop himself while he's ahead and gather his thoughts, "I needja t' guide me, a'right...?" He studies Dean's visage closely, small huffs escaping him as the man rolls his body in his hands. "D... do y'wanna... stop......?"</p><p>Fuck. Dean does whine now at the friction of Benny's beard, the press of his lips and bite of teeth to skin. His whole body is throbbing with this ache that isn't pain and he can tell only vaguely how Benny is holding himself back, keeping in check. It absolutely floors Dean that he would do that, keep so much control...but he realizes, under all else, that he wants this. He wants Benny to keep going. "No," Dean gasps, pulls his head upright and grabs the back of Benny's neck abruptly, biting his own lip as he moves his hips forward and down into Benny in circles and thrusts. "No, don't stop, Benny, c'mon…"</p><p>Somewhere the pit of his stomach churns like an uncontrollable storm, gouging at his insides with an increasing need. The more hasty and haphazardly Dean grinds into him, the more restricting his pants become. His jaw grows slack as he squints, gawking in delightful incredulity. "...Baby..." he purrs, removing his hand from Dean's waistline and placing both on his hips. In the distance he hears the faint sounds of the movie credits coming to a close, but they're swiftly masked by Dean's voice when he rocks his hips up into Dean's, each of his movements deep and rough as he teeters on the edge of unraveling. He wants this too— GOD, does he want it.</p><p>Dean grips both of Benny's shoulders as he works his hips down and into his lap and the growing tightness as he groans, lips parted and eyes half-closed as he gauges Benny's reactions and continues his own.  </p><p>Enticed by Dean's expression, Benny leans in close, breath hot against his face. Their lips parted, an inch or two apart but never connecting. One hand moves to support the lower part of the other's back as Benny brushes himself against Dean's girth, dilated eyes solely focused on anything and everything Dean Winchester.</p><p>Benny's growl reverberates through Dean's body as their faces are so close, and his hand is so strong on Dean's lower back, bracketing him in, holding him, it's - Dean ducks his head as Benny is pressing to him, holding back another whimper. It's - he feels safe...</p><p>So safe. But he's also burning up with desire and the friction between them is amazing but it's also not enough, and Dean knows he's sounding needy but he barely thinks about it before whining out on a gasp as they press, throbbing and shuddering, against each other "Benny...unh, Benny. I want you to - I need you to touch me, c'mon. Please."</p><p>Benny simply grunts in acknowledgement, moving the hand from Dean's hip to the front of his pants and venturing under it. He is gentle in giving Dean a squeeze, massaging his thumb across the fabric and the skin beneath it. He's a wreck watching Dean with such a laserfocus that he almost feels dizzy. A breathy chuckle ripples out of him. "Ya look... delightful, sher'ff..." he croons. But if he's serious about this... "You gotta te... tell me where I'm goin'..." He smiles, pressing a kiss to Dean's jawline to elicit another whimper. "Can't... stay here."</p><p>Dean blinks, head flopping back as Benny's hand - so big, so gentle - squeezes and sends a shock of warmth from his toes to the crown of his head. The cool press of lips makes him whimper but his brow creases, buzzing in his head, his ears, everything is just... Benny that he sways and grabs on to the other, pressing into Benny's grip and holding his shoulder. "What d'you -uh," spots are dancing before his eyes as he shakes. He's never had someone... ask to go anywhere. "You - wanna - go...?" He clarifies, or tries to, but he doesn't know, he just adds, almost pathetically, "... where?"</p><p>Benny chuckles again, shifting his hand further and cupping him tentatively. "Your room, sweetheart," he provides with a toothy grin, closing his eyes as he brushes his cheek against Dean's, beard scratching skin. "Don't want y' back... hurtin'... on your couch…"</p><p>"Oh...," Dean breathes, and "yeah, that - alright. Uh," he shifts his hips and then incongruously his eyes start itching. What, no, damn it, come on - burying his face in Benny's shoulder because he doesn't want to get up, doesn't want to stop feeling Benny's hand, he mumbles "Through the door by the TV, end of the hall, that's -" shifting himself, turning his face to press full lips to Benny's neck, he finishes "...that's m' bedroom."</p><p>Benny nods, removing his hands before placing one more kiss to the side of Dean's head. Shifting in his seat, he reaches his arm around to Dean's back, slowly encouraging the other to lean against it. Seeing the bewilderment appear on Dean's face when he pulls back, moving his legs in the process, Benny gives him a tender look as he snakes his other arm under Dean's knees. "I gotchu, sha," he assures, pulling Dean close, secure against his chest as he carefully rises from the couch. As he starts walking to where he's been directed, short breaths escaping through his nose, he ponders their situation. Reaching a door that he only needs to nudge open with a foot, he chortles to himself. He's had relations before, sure. A high school sweetheart that lasted a while, but she... well. It didn't happen. But this, he thinks as he gently places a pink-faced Dean on his bed, this one is something, though he can't quite put a finger on it.</p><p>"Thank you," Benny says as he shrugs off his own shirt now, and then watching with a small pang of sadness the confusion flash across Dean's face. Deserves the world and doesn't even know it…</p><p>"For..." Thank you, Benny says. Thank you, he says after literally CARRYING DEAN TO BED, like that isn't going to shatter him into a million pieces, like he doesn't understand, how can he be so - Dean's breath stops as Benny takes off his shirt, revealing all that glorious strength, curling hair and Dean reaches up, fingertips catching nipples and then sliding down Benny's sides, curving around his back and then curling, dragging to press his abs and stroke his chest, and Dean feels heat flushing in his face as he still throbs and keeps wondering how...how he's managed to land this, how he's gotten this undeservedly lucky.</p><p>Benny draws in air quickly at the sensation of Dean's hands, tensing— not out of apprehension but excitement— and feeling himself twitch. "Can't wait for me t' get in th' bed yet...?" he teases, placing his hands on the edge of the sheets and abruptly leaning in close so that he was an inch from Dean's face. "Y'know," he growls, "you can touch whateve' you want as much as you'd like, darlin'. I ain't gonn' bite."</p><p>Dean flinches, shudders, but then his brows quirk as he just looks at Benny and his throat bobs before he slides his hand around Benny's back and pushes, letting the other's weight rest on him, shifting himself to rub against Benny and then he takes hold of the back of Benny's neck with his other hand and crashes his lips to Benny's, a nonverbal thanks of his own, eyes squeezing shut as he moves his lips, as he sucks Benny's lower one into his mouth, rubbing his chin into the bristles of Benny's beard and feeling so warm, and safe, and good -</p><p>Pulling his right leg, which currently still hovered off of the bed slightly thanks to Dean's eagerness, Benny laughs into his mouth, giving back just as earnestly, just as passionate and sweet. He rests on his elbows, sighing, contented, pulling away for a second to shiver. It's too hot to bear. With a hushed groan, hungry eyes trained on Dean's form, he props his weight onto one arm and reaches with the other, seizing the edge of his own pants and pulling them off, leaving only his boxers. "What are ya doin' to me...?" he remarks, shaking his head as he marvels at the other man with another grin.</p><p>Dean flushes, ducking his head as he trails his fingers down Benny's sides and then grabs onto both of his hips now free from pants. "This," he says, and pulls Benny flush to him so they can feel each other. He knows what Benny's asking, but this is his only answer, as he closes his eyes and bites his lip and rolls himself against Benny. This is -</p><p>"H-hah...... Dean..." Benny pants, clenching his teeth and snapping his eyes shut. All at once he unravels, shifting his weight to his knees, pressed on either side of Dean's body, his hands trailing over that amazing freckled skin. Hovering, he meets him, gliding his hand under Dean's ass and raising it as he grinds against him, seeking... seeking something he's well acquainted with, but doesn't yet dare to pursue. Not without explicit permission.</p><p>He senses under his finger tips the heat radiating off of Dean, causing him to involuntarily claw at the dense fabric still donned, which makes him begin to sweat profusely. "Baby, i-if we're goin'... all th' way, I need t'... know whe'e ya hidin' your pr'tection," he rasps, heavy-lidded gaze darting to Dean's long pants. "An' you gotta lose those...... I know you got... s...some bonny legs on ya...... an' I wanna see 'em."</p><p>Dean wriggles and does his best to grin, "You looking for a strip tease, Benny?"</p><p>Stilling, wholly serious in aspect in a way that makes Dean's breath catch "Yes," Benny responds. "Yes please."</p><p>Dean's eyes get huge and he nods. "...okay," he says. Then, the other words hit and Benny's legs are warm and bracing, and he wants him so bad ... "Drawer," Dean gasps. "Top - there's -" condoms and lotion, but he doesn't manage to say anything else, instead taking his hands to his own waist, flexing shoulders and straightening his arms as he curls his fingers around his waistband and steadily pushes the fabric down, watching Benny as he does.</p><p>Benny, barely catching what was said, glues his gaze to Dean, jaw going slack but mouth not yet parting. He eventually does move as one of Dean's knees starts to peek out, eyes flickering briefly to catch sight of the nightstand next to the bed. But instead of simply sliding out of bed and getting what they need, he continues to stare, arm flailing vaguely in the direction of the top drawer. He does manage to snag the handle after a couple of tries, leaning over and slightly craning his neck, shuffling wildly through the contents inside and finding nothing of the items in question. Figuring Dean might have misspoken, he stretches further to reach for the bottom one and nearly slips off the bed entirely, his other hand shooting out to catch himself on the nightstand, promptly obscuring his view— though he might have just provided his partner with one of his own with the position he is in. </p><p>When he hears Dean stop what he's doing, Benny releases a hearty laugh at his predicament, pulls open the drawer, and grabs what he was searching for. Sighing with the effort of sitting back up and placing the items on the bed, he instantly goes red in the face at how many extra condoms he grabbed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Ah– hah... I wasn't, uh...... well," he beams, "I s'ppose ya can't be too careful...!"</p><p>Dean smirks, even as his heartbeat rackets up a few notches. "Right," he replies, licking his lips and reaching out to Benny, curling his hand around the other's muscle-bound arm. </p><p>He swallows, eyes flickering. "Benny, what - do you, want me to...?" To do, what does he need to do, to be good for Benny. He kicks his pants off the rest of the way with a shimmy, circling hips once and focusing on Benny's face. </p><p>"Aw, doll... you're already doin' a fine job," Benny offers honestly, shuffling close again, his pitch having risen just a tad as to convey how much he meant that. Then, sitting back against his heels, he thinks for a moment and nods to himself. "Well, there /is/ somethin'... but I'll let'chu know wh'n we get to it." His eyes pass from Dean, to himself, then back again, and he lets out a heavy sigh through his nose and shakes his head, chuckling. "'M probably gettin' t' be annoyin' with all this askin', but... Dean," his visage is firm, "is this okay...? Do ya wanna keep on?"</p><p>Dean's heart feels too damned big for his chest as he nods, as he follows Benny's movement with his own face and chest swaying forward, cheeks hot, the slightest whimper leaving his throat at how kind and decent and just... "Yeah, Benny, let's - I -" he feels ridiculous, needy for how many times he's been saying please, but he not only wants this, he needs this. Needs him. "Please," Dean's tone is almost a murmur as he swallows, reaching out. "Let's keep going, I wanna keep going...."</p><p>"A'right," Benny responds in kind, moving his arms to either side of Dean and leaning in so quickly to press his forehead to his that there's almost a solid knocking sound. "I got'chu, sha," he breathes, gently holding Dean's waist with a hand, "I'm here." /I'll take care of you/, he pours into each movement. He puffs out another breath, then, moving his hand to Dean's thigh, mumbles, "Lay back for me, mm'kay? I... I'll be careful... I promise." He places a kiss to Dean's head. "Slow, like we said."</p><p>Dean nods, body undulating in response, Benny's lips and words sending shockwaves through his entirety. He tingles at Benny's words, his sentiments, and with a long exhale he settles down on his back, stretching out on the bed. "Okay, Benny. You got it." /You've got me,/ he means, and everything in his moves and eyes express trust. Benny's got this. He's got him.</p><p>Fond expression on his face at the sight of the stunning man beneath him, Benny mumbles something affectionate but even he isn't one hundred percent certain what he said, focusing his attention now on trailing delicate kisses from Dean's neck down to his stomach. Benny pauses to lean back, dragging his hands down Dean's sides and then his legs. He lets him know that he'll remove his underwear before he does, promptly placing more kisses to Dean's inner thighs, praising him for how soft his skin is.</p><p>Dean gasps and the muscles of his thighs tremble under Benny's lips, he expels little whines and groans as he shifts and grows and his eyes are trained on Benny when he can and on the ceiling above when feeling gets to be too much. His hand closes in Benny's hair and then his fingers tremble as he strokes the locks, curling to brush Benny's cheek and the bristles of his beard with the palm and heel of Dean's hand.</p><p>Benny purrs against his skin and sits up just a bit to reach for the lotion. Take it slow. He can be patient. Just make him feel good. Spreading some in his palm, he carefully takes hold of Dean in his hand and tries a few strokes. "This good, sweetheart...?"</p><p>"Aah, Ben - Benny, yes," his muscles jerk again, hand dropping out of Benny's hair to clutch at his shoulder instead. "That - keep..., unh" Benny's grasp tightens along his length, closer to the head, tight and then loose, curling round and Dean can't keep his hips still, he moves into the grip, still groaning. "Is this, am I - I'm..." He's never felt this way before.</p><p>"What is it, darlin'...?" he murmurs lowly, drawing close so he could appreciate the half-disoriented, half-euphoric look on Dean's face. "Mm?" He rubs his thumb over the head, rolling circles into it gently, smiling, in awe. His stomach swoops with exhilaration. "You look so sweet, baby... Y'know that?"</p><p>Dean gasps, automatically shaking his head, negating those words, but he throws his arm across his face, mouthing inarticulate words as he throbs and shudders and leaks even as his eyes keep prickling and his skin sticks with sweat. His hips move shallowly as he arches his back and everything stiffens and grows to a pinnacle, a precipice where Dean hangs, bare and blissful in Benny's attentions as his hand on Benny's shoulder clenches and unclenches, fingertips scrabbling and gripping Benny's skin as everything crashes over him.</p><p>"That was—... wow," Benny gapes, gaze darting across the other man's form as he caresses his leg. "My.... Look at'chu...... Ya really are somethin', Dean." He chuckles, then nods at him. "How 'bout'cha take a breather? Need some water...?"</p><p>Dean's forehead wrinkles the slightest bit as he shifts his legs and hips, feeling a heaviness and congealing that causes him to shiver, and he swallows, throat clicking on words. Gotta form words. "I - yeah, I mean... Should - gotta get cleaned up...," But he feels floppy, almost boneless, and Benny is looking on him with such softness in his face, in his eyes; he's squeezing Dean's shoulder and then pressing a kiss to the inside of his knee.</p><p>"I got that," his voice rumbles. "Ya got washrags in th' bathroom, yeah?"</p><p>"I - yeah, it's through there..." His bedroom, as a master, for what it is, has its own bathroom. Dean's eyes are burning again, he cannot believe everything this man is doing for him. "But Benny -"</p><p>"Easy, darlin'," Benny stands, pushing his hand through Dean's sweaty hair and then dipping to kiss his forehead. "I'll be back." He lopes, in nothing but his own underpants, into the bathroom and Dean hears water running before he's back with a washcloth, damp on one end, water drops clinging to Benny's knuckles as he kneels and wipes Dean clean with cloth and hand, patting dry his skin as well as the sheets.</p><p>Benny hums in satisfaction, tossing the cloth lazily in the pile they've started on the floor. "One second," he utters, heading out of the room. He doesn't see the way Dean stiffens when he does leave, but he has a feeling so he quickens his gait. When he returns, it's with bottled water. He laughs sheepishly as he raises it for emphasis. "Couldn't find any glasses," he says. </p><p>But the truth is he didn't look. He just lucked out that there was some water in the refrigerator. At least it got him back faster. </p><p>Handing it over to Dean with a "here," he strolls over to the other side of the bed, plopping down beside Dean with a huff and intertwining his hands over his stomach. He flops his head over to face him, offering a light smile. "Hey, there…"</p><p>Dean, his heart having sped up to hammer now in his neck, swallows, trying to relax as Benny returns, accepting the bottle and cracking open its lid. "...hey," he says, voice rough even as he tries to speak easily, eyes still on Benny as he takes a swig of the cold water. It rushes, feeling amazing in his throat and he sighs after he drinks before adding fervently "thanks, Benny."</p><p>And then he gulps more water, pretty much finishing the whole bottle before he has the chance to think too much, because then his face would burn again and he wouldn't be able to look at Benny and... Dean inhales sharply through his nose, clenching a fist and lifting it and his arm to his lips, wiping them off. No, come on. Calm down, Dean. He counsels himself. Benny is being so...he's just, he's great, and Dean looks at him and then at the bottle before letting out a rueful little laugh. "I should've asked if you wanted some. Ah, damn it."</p><p>Shifting to rest on his elbow, Benny props his head up with his hand. "Nahh... feelin' just fine, Dean. But I appreciate the thought." He raises his eyebrows. "Speakin' of... how are you doin'..." and then he adds as an afterthought, "...so far...?"</p><p>Dean, letting out another huff of air, nods with a swallow. "Okay, good. Me?" He lifts one bare shoulder, waving the bottle around with a cocky smile. "Oh I'm... great. Yeah." Benny lifts a brow but is just lying there, turned completely facing him and listening, and Dean can't lie to him. His breath heaves out and he laughs a little. "Heh. I - really, I feel...good, 's just - a lot." His bright gaze locks on Benny's. "But I /am/ good, okay? I - want this. I, uh, really like this, with you." Damn he feels as though his face is on fire, and takes the final swig of water before coughing, of course. But he manages to reach out and catch hold of Benny's hand, giving it a squeeze. Then, shifting a little, clearing his throat. "Uh, whatta 'bout you? Are you good?"</p><p>Benny's heart swells, hearing those words. They might not be the most eloquent, but he gets the gist. He knows. It's Dean's way of showing him, and he knows. And that makes him elated beyond comprehension. Then, catching Dean's question, he laughs with amusement. "Already told you, sha...... Ha, but I'm fine. Better th'n that." He squeezes his hand back. "Promise."</p><p>Okay, okay. Dean nods. "Good," he says, tone deep. Shifting a little, he lets go his hold on Benny's hand and pats his leg. "So, uh...you wanna..." Closing his eyes, swearing inwardly at himself, Dean feels this rushing within, this - he still, he wants Benny, so much. </p><p>With women, it's never been a problem for Dean to act on. He's always sure, and he always makes sure he knows what they want too. This... it's - he hasn't been this way, the way he is with Benny, before. And that, it doesn't scare him, but like he said, it's a lot. He wants it, he really wants it, but - and he can have it, Benny is here just offering himself and being so damn good and patient, but... </p><p>But nothing. Nothing except the ghosts of things. Of the past. Of this not being okay in his father's view, and Dean dealing with that.</p><p>But things are different. He is here, isn't he? He's here, with Benny. And as much as it hits him and makes his heart go crazy, Dean knows he doesn't want to be anywhere else.</p><p>So Dean breathes. He breathes, and swallows, and asks of Benny what he wants, and wants to know, so much. "You wanna ...keep going?"</p><p>At this, Benny grins wide. "You're just as nervous as I am, ain't'cha...?" he chortles, ducking his head. "Of course—" he starts, then looks to meet Dean's eyes, pleading for him to see him as he says this, for him to feel him say it, "—of course I want to, Dean. Ya have t' know that." He licks his lips then continues. "I ain't th' type t' kiss an' run... I don't." He nods. "Just let me know wh'n ya ready. There's no rush."</p><p>Dean's heart thuds, and he feels himself twitch. He shifts closer to Benny, surprised by the admission of nerves. Not that Benny WOULD admit to having 'em, if he did, because they've always been honest with each other. But... Dean is surprised that Benny is nervous.</p><p>But it's - it's sweet. Endearing. Probably means he doesn't want to fuck this up, just like Dean doesn't. Or, maybe he's not feeling that drastically about it, but. </p><p>Rolling onto his knees now, Dean moves to Benny and puts arms around him, settling into the other man's chest before looking up and raising his fingers to Benny's cheek. He strokes his face and then his beard, and as Benny looks at him, Dean surges forward and up, pressing his lips to Benny's in a sweet, long, languid kiss. They can take their time, but this is good stuff. Yeah. And knowing where Benny stands, he wants to reassure him and to get started.</p><p>Benny moans into the embrace, calloused hand brushing against Dean's own, his other reaching up to grasp a hold of his hair. Unaware, he brings his knee up, heel dragging against the sheets beneath them. So focused on Dean, though that is no fault of his, he neglected himself— and, as he deepens their kiss with a ravenous growl, his whole being jolts.</p><p>This was... He knew Dean had stamina, but this was different. It wasn't just excitement or just simple desire. Something was... there. Something...</p><p>He meets Dean eagerly, demanding. Any other time he might look on himself and say to go slower, but he can't help it. He wants this. He wants Dean. And Dean's showing him that he does too. That it's okay. They can keep going...... His hands find the other man's ass again, gripping and clawing at the skin now. So they will.</p><p>Dean smiles and then he feels everything about Benny, how hard he grips, how swiftly he moves, and yes. Hell yes. Benny's hands on his ass send more shockwaves through him and he meets Benny's growls with his own grunts and gasps, sighs of pleasure as first he tugs his hair. Yes, yes, yes. "There," he breathes. "There we go, c'mon." </p><p>Something seems to tickle him about the vigor in Dean's tone, or perhaps it isn't only amusement that he's feeling. As if being pulled up by his chest, he sits up, haphazardly moving his hands to drag his nails down Dean's thighs, letting out a subconscious enraptured noise of surprise at the reaction that draws out. Suddenly frantic to trigger another response, darkened eyes darting wildly along Dean's form, one hand shoots out, searching randomly for a spot to rest for a moment; then he chooses to grip at Dean's hair once more, tugging at it and curling his fingers at the base of his neck, enjoying the prickling of the short hair there. His second hand glides to where Dean's hip meets his thigh and his grip is fast, firm, needy. With that leverage, his hips surge up and he crushes into Dean, a nearly silent cry escaping his throat as he feels himself throb severely through his underwear against Dean's own stiffening length. "D—amn..." he gasps, voice almost catching and eyes snapping shut.</p><p>The strength and abandon with which Benny is moving, holding, crushing against him goes beyond excitement for Dean. He grunts at the sensations, heart leaping, stomach fluttering at the scrape of nails down his thighs, of the subsequent possessive grasp around the nape of his neck. It thrills him to see and hear and feel Benny like this, and he licks his lips, squirming, rubbing himself against Benny. His voice hitches, going high with a sound of pleasure.</p><p> "Here you go," Dean nearly croons, then; his voice rough, deep, breathy. "What else d'you -mm- do you want, Benny?" </p><p>All nerves screaming at him to slow down like they had previously were hushed now, so— as he slides his hand up to tweak and press a nipple with his other hand fastening Dean's thigh to him, which he happily and shamelessly indulges himself into grinding against— Benny has to will himself to focus. "Jus' k...keep... doin' what'cha doin', doll," Benny utters a low, breathy sound akin to a small laugh, bracing his chin against Dean's shoulder now. Then, before he continues losing himself, something seems to sober him a bit. "...Y... wai'...... you've done thi... ah, this before... right...? Di'n't ask ya that... earlier."</p><p>Dean groans at the touch, bucking into it, and Benny, but as he hears those words, he freezes. Hands curl around Benny's arms. Feels hazy and so light, but in his head there's a weight, and he doesn't want to say... because Benny might change his mind, or - no. This is Benny. He has to tell him. They don't lie to each other.</p><p>Dean, face pressed against Benny's, cheek brushing and nuzzling repeatedly into his beard, mumbles "...no, I haven't. You're my, um - this is - my first," and how pathetic is that? He thinks, and squirms, shutting his eyes tight. But he keeps pressing to Benny, body jerking as the other grinds. "but I - unh, I got this. Just keep -" keep going, his mind supplies. He can figure it out. "I don't wanna stop."</p><p>Blue eyes, bleary from his own pleasure-filled daze, clear up a bit as they fixate on Dean's expression. His heart crushes to his ribs as he feels shame burning off of Dean, scared of judgment... scared of rejection. His first— oh, Dean...</p><p>But he doesn't judge, nor reject. He feels honored to be here. He offers a loving smile, and though Dean doesn't see it, he makes sure to show it in his voice when he says, "Then... let's make this th' best night o' your life. How's that soun'...?" he purrs, which rumbles in his chest. He doesn't stop moving as Dean doesn't either. He couldn't even if he wanted to, which is the last thought on his mind. He tilts his head, to catch Dean's reaction. "I'm here, sweetheart... All th' way."</p><p>God. Dean doesn't know what to friggin say, but he moves harder and hits a spot that makes him cry out and Benny groan, and he nods, holding on so tightly to this man who's - with him, who is making him feel ...so good, and light, and the clenching of his insides eases even as throbbing increases, because this feels so good and he can't articulate in words but he just wants to make this the best night for Benny too….</p><p>To be worth that. Worthy of that.</p><p>Benny nods as well then, wetting his lips, briefly shifts Dean off of him and straightens up. There's no sensual peeling of clothes, just vicious tugging as he slides his boxers down and off his legs to free himself without a second thought. He vaguely registers an intake of breath that isn't his, eyes screwed to Dean's chest while he does this and, when he's done, he abruptly pulls Dean to his chest with a hand on the small of his back. "Com'ere, sha," he growls, nearly a snarl as they press, throbbing fiercely against each other. Having moved to rest on his knees, he uses one to nudge Dean's own to one side of him, his other hand seizing the man's other leg to pull is flush to the adjacent. Don't want to move. Not taking his eyes off of him for a second, he then reaches with the hand on Dean's leg for the neglected bottle. The sound of a small sheet of plastic protests under his fingers, and he grabs that too once he finds the lotion. Dean... look at Dean. Casting them to the side so they were within reach, he cranes his neck as he grabs onto some pillows from behind him and replaces them behind Dean, pressing a few kisses into his neck as he wraps his arms now around his waist so he can fluff them up. "/God/," he rasps in disbelief. Why is he such a bundle of nerves? His mind wanders to a thought, one that he hasn't had in quite some time: Is this really happening right now? And as he stares into Dean's bright eyes, his heart rejoices. "You... you're gonna hafta... lean back a bit, baby... I don't wanna hurt'cha... Jus' gotta get y'ready."</p><p>Dean's breath hitches at how sharp and immediate Benny is, how he jerks his boxers off his legs and swings free, and all that Dean can do is haul in air that he'd held. And feel every part of him buzzing with pleasure as Benny pulls him, moves him, the soft pillows fluffed behind, the warmth and shifts and movement, he sees Benny's gaze and cannot stop trailing his eyes over Benny in return. "Okay," his voice is wrecked, already, unable even to articulate a quip after Benny speaks as he shimmies into position, following where Benny puts the pillows and presses to him, lips hot and needy on Dean's skin as he keeps rocking and undulating.</p><p>Dean moves as well, wrapping his own legs around Benny's hips, keeping that friction as they move together, as he waits for whatever else Benny will do with arms behind him, holding him. Dean wants - anything, and everything, and it all hits him in a rush, the wanting. He heaves upwards to press to Benny, off the newly-plumped pillows and above the protection in reach. He tilts, offering more purchase, shifting his body so his backside is accessible for Benny to easily touch.</p><p>Benny has to stifle a low sound, a laugh instead bubbling out of him as he ducks his head, lotion now in hand. "Easy, there, darlin'...!" he shivers. "I needja t' f... focus for me." How amusingly ironic— in trying to make love he's getting distracting by the very subject of his affections. He can't blame Dean though. Not when he feels like he might burst right out of his body with excitement himself.</p><p>Coating his fingers thoroughly, he then shows Dean one. "Y... ya gotta breathe for me, okay? Just relax. I'm gonna go slow— I'm tellin' ya, Dean, you /can't/ rush this... understand?"</p><p>Dean, heartbeat skipping as he takes note of that, of Benny's finger coated and how that looks versus - his body gives a little jump and he breathes, settling, working to go pliant. Can't rush this. Right. "...okay," he breathes heavily again, wriggling and then stopping, working to relax. </p><p>Benny waits for Dean to get comfortable, tensing his jaw as he stares into the man's eyes, silently imploring him to be patient with him. He puffs out air, then starts applying some lotion on Dean. He senses the slightest tremble result from his touch, but that doesn't halt his actions. He gives another pause. "Okay, now...... Breathe in an' out for me, darlin'."</p><p>Dean hauls in air, the coolness of lotion contrasting with the warmth of Benny's hand massaging his muscles, and then as he inhales, Benny pushes past, careful and easy and slow, and gently strokes inside him on Dean's exhale. It's - a lot, but feels good, and the lotion keeps things moving more easily. It's ...so much, but gets easier, and he's so steady and gentle that Dean finds himself rocking into the touch, letting out little noises.</p><p>And Benny, Benny is enthralled. He keeps his eyes trained on Dean's face to take note of every minute expression, every huff of breath and screwed-up brow, every time his jaw goes slack a little and he gasps on air; and Benny feels a warmth bloom in his chest as Dean relaxes by increments, rolling his hips and body backwards into Benny's touch. He gets more lotion on his next finger and presses his lips to Dean's head and cheek and neck, murmuring "...you ready for more 'a me, Dean? Does that feel a' right?" </p><p>In truth he's overwhelmed. Physically, he's— well... he's not entirely sure. But emotionally? He's ragged. Dean can't— It's too much to sort through what it is that he's feeling, but as he arches back against the pillows beneath him, those sensations almost seem to blind him and he releases an involuntary cry. He shivers and he quakes and he whines. He's bare, not just in the physical sense, and all his thoughts are irrepressibly fixated on Benny. It's raw, these thoughts soaring through his head so fast he can hardly register them, equally miserable and gratifying. It hurts, his mind tells him, though he can tell it's not physical— though, if he's only a little bit uncomfortable? Maybe. But that's not what his attention is on. </p><p>His heart beats sharp, it seems to him, when he takes a peek at Benny. Benny, who's so wonderful, so patient, so goddamn sweet it could rot his teeth... Turning his head away for a second to watch the wall— or anything else in the room really— for a second, he sucks in a shuddering breath, his eyes burning now, and he pinches his lips together before parting them. It's not a normal pain, this. He feels—... GOD, does he feel...... </p><p>After a break, he rolls his head back to face Benny. He swallows then provides him the slight perk of the corners of his mouth. "Y..." Another gulp. He pays jo mind to how wretched his voice sounds. "...y-yeah, Ben—... Go for it, I..." He nods fervently, shutting his eyes. "Ready."</p><p>Benny nods, he shifts his free hand and reaches out, stroking Dean's hair, cupping and holding his cheek. "Alright, breathe, here y' go, sha," second finger, pushing in, working, he keeps holding Dean, pressing his lips to Dean's and then whispering into his mouth as Dean expels more quiet sounds "I gotcha, I gotcha."</p><p>Butterflies stir in the pit of him and Dean whips a hand out to grab a fistful of the sheets. His hips raise and Benny has to hush into his ear for him to breathe when it catches in his throat. He nods, again and again, swallowing helplessly when he doesn't immediately resume breathing. He does, of course, gasping in air and expelling it with a heave. He can sense Benny pausing his motions to ask if he's alright as he throws up his other hand to grip at anything... anything Benny. Dean finds skin, Benny's knee, and then shakes his head. Words. Use your words, he wills himself. "N—... no. I'm f...fine... Ju— a lot. Ah-haa... a lot. Bu... it's good, I-I'm good," he tells him, honest.</p><p>Good. Benny nods, ducking his head to press to Dean, feeling Dean's grasp on his knee as he keeps working into him, gentle, still gentle even as he feels so tightly strung, his heart beats in his length and in his fingers, in every movement and clench and tensing of Dean's body around him, as he pushes to the place that makes Dean's body jackknife with another cry, a sound he hasn't before heard, but preceding Dean's rapid pants and a litany of groans of Benny's name, like something was unlocked in him and he buries his face into a pillow as he thrusts himself on Benny, moving even as Benny moves, Dean's back arching as his skin glows with sweat that slides. Lets out yips and continues clenching the sheets in his hands, wanting more, more, /more/.</p><p>Benny is dazzled, finding himself following Dean's movements with his head. He isn't completely certain on Dean's limit regarding overstimulation so he doesn't even dare try and touch him anywhere else. Just watches, and offers quiet words of encouragement and praise, jaw dropping at the way Dean buckles and twists, at the way his legs raise and toes start to curl, at the way his hazy green eyes eventually find his blue... and his soul seems to trascend his body. Biting his lip, Benny supplies more lotion around his fingers, using his other hand to gently rub it into the skin, his own rippling to life with goosebumps down his arms, legs, and as far up as his cheeks. He's doing that— as if he's only just realized it. Dean's coming undone right in front of him, and Benny's doing that... Incredible. No wonder he can't stop beaming. Then he murmurs, brushing back some of Dean's hair, "Lemme know when ya c'n... handle anothe' one, a'right?"</p><p>Dean is so far past words that he can only gasp and move himself with Benny, his muscles trembling and locking as the feeling like a molten length of magma all through his body, from Benny's fingertips through him, starting and spreading. "Yes..." He manages at long last, eyes locked on Benny's, nothing but their blue clear in his view, bursts of white light crackling through him with every shiver, every movement.</p><p>He hums in acknowledgment, then ghosts his free hand lightly on Dean's leg before pressing his hand down, giving him a secure squeeze. "In an' out, Dean," he reminds him softly, receiving the barest of nods in response. Breathing in unison, Benny tentatively starts to insert a third, heedful of Dean's muscles tensing at the intrusion. He stops at the tip of his finger so he can adjust. "Doin' alright there, chief...?" he chuckles, airy.</p><p>"Y...yeah," Dean gulps, lips a circle as he exhales, feeling Benny's breath as acutely as he feels his fingers, and the slip and tense, tightness slowly loosening as much of his muscles and of thoughts; of long-buried beliefs and wishes, hopes and sensations...and feelings. So many feelings. </p><p>His body is as raw as his throat sounds with the exit of rough whimpers and grunts and gasps, laid as spread-eagle and bare as is his body splayed under Benny's ministering hands. And Dean wants ...he wants it to be time, he knows Benny said they'd take things slow, that this /needs/ to be slow, but his feelings, coupled with sensation, are stretched taut and screaming in him and he just - "Benny, I - need you," /inside me/ Dean exhales heavily, can't will his throat to work on those final words and expel them aloud. </p><p>He thrusts back instead, desperate to accept the last of Benny's digits and to be open for him,  and his voice chokes on a wavery note of want that sends along his body shivers, goosebumps rising on Dean's sweaty, flushed skin.</p><p>"O-okay," Benny heaves, retracting his fingers with immense care. "Okay— okay, baby, I gotcha..." Grunting as he scrambles for the condom, fiddling with the plastic before finally tearing it open, he releases a long sigh to ease the jitters severely wracking his body now. His hands are steady as he rolls it on in spite of his heart rate almost deafening in his ears. Settling himself again, he reaches out to help Dean sit up a little. He manages to utter a "gotta watch" as he braces his arm behind Dean's back, then tilts his head a bit and smiles. "Hah... ready wh'n you are…"</p><p>Dean, throbbing all over, fully hard and aching in his own right, hears the jitter in Benny's voice. It's more a hitch, but he gets the sense and it gives him the ability to speak. "hey," shifting his hips and reaching out a hand, he curls it around the back of Benny's neck, pulling himself upright to rest his forehead against the other's. Their noses brush, their breath mingles. "I'm ready, I'm good. Are you good?" His other hand goes to Benny's side, fingers bumping down the slight ridges of the side of Benny's ribcage, touching the quivering muscles in his abdomen, squeezing one powerful thigh. </p><p>Dean gets a wicked little grin on his face as he feels Benny, wrapped already, and takes him in hand to squeeze firmly. But the tease is also security, because he locks his eyes on Benny's with his pert little grin still curving full pink lips before his eyelashes flutter and he leans in, capturing Benny's mouth in a deep but gentle kiss.</p><p>Relishing, falling, dissolving into those lips, moist with saliva, he's blown away. And it's his turn to bite the bottom now, sucking just barely before he releases, fingers moving to delicately caress them as if in a silent apology. Benny then raises his head back sharply, furrowing his brow, but keeps his eyes set on Dean. He opens his mouth in a smile, a good-natured laugh billowing out from him. "You test me, sha..." he hums with amusement and exhaustion brought by his own nerves, hips undulating involuntarily beneath Dean's grasp. And his words catch onto his ears as his gaze shoots downward. He expells air and then jests, "I think I'd be better if I 'membered t' do ev'rythin'," before pumping some lotion onto himself. Spreading it thoroughly, he lingers on Dean's hand with his own, stroking a thumb along the skin between his thumb and index. "I'm followin' you now," he says. "Grab onto me, hard as y'need to— I c'n take it. But you /stop/," he holds Dean's gaze, intense, "you stop if it hurts. Don't power through it. Not this..." Please. "a'right...?"</p><p>Dean nods, his eyes slight as his lips come away from Benny's, as he watches the other man's hand - oh, god - as that little vulnerable instance makes him want to just...hold Benny in his arms. But he wants this, wants HIM so much, that he swears, promises himself that he'll do that later. After. </p><p>Now, whilst turning, rolling himself over onto his stomach in deliberate, inexorable fashion, and giving as much access as he had for Benny's fingers to guide him in, he spreads himself and takes ahold of Benny, covered in lotion and condom, still so warm and ready and Dean holds and pushes himself on, hauling in a breath as with his movement he says "I will," and "now I gotcha," moving, shifting himself to take and take as much as he can, til he is flush against Benny, hair tickling as he's filling Dean up -</p><p>And Benny moans, hands grabbing onto the sides of Dean's waist as he shudders and squeezes, automatically thrusting forward once with his hips, situating himself.</p><p>Holding for a while, they simply breathe, taking in the feeling of one another. Dean's throat sings and Benny lows when one or even both shift a smidge, testing the waters. Benny buries his face into the side of Dean's neck, laying down a few kisses. He murmurs into the skin a question, there is a pause and then a brisk nod from Dean, and they start to move... slowly. </p><p>They spend a few minutes rolling into each other at a steady pace, Benny providing shallow yet earnest thrusts, holding firm Dean's legs for leverage. Dean roughly seizes one of the other's arms, short nails pinching, air pumping out of him, hardly wavering, as if steam from a locomotive. His head lolls a little, which Benny supports with his own, pushing back affectionately and rolling his so that he brushes his cheek against Dean. He mumbles delicate words, tender-hearted, but they're a bit lost on Dean for the moment, who jerks his hips backward, wanting— needing more friction. Benny, on the other hand, has another thing in mind. </p><p>"Gotta... gotta tell ya, suga'..." Benny begins, pulling out almost all the way, painstakingly slow, and whining when Dean whimpers above him. "No one's ever... /ever/ captured my... attention... like— like you, hah—... I..." He swallows and wets his lips. "...Ya don't have... any reason t'...... t' believe me... I know that... but I— I mean it." Gasping shallowly, he pushes back in, farther, cautious in his movements, though his grip on Dean's thigh is nearly bruising. "Y-y... you're special— ahh......" He feels himself getting a bit misty as he melts. "You're beautiful."</p><p>Dean's breaths hitch as Benny moves, as feeling builds, and then he says those things and Dean shudders. His eyes are burning and he can't - he can't let... why can't he just let him say it? But it's not - "Benny, y-you're too damn good to me. I... I'm not....,"</p><p>"No," Benny swiftly interjects, tone so booming that it startles Dean into turning to look at him. All movements cease. "No, no, darlin'. Don't do that." When he sees it, another objection on Dean's lips, he shakes his head. "Don't you dare." He straightens up, resting his chin on the man's shoulder. </p><p>"You listen t' me now, Dean Winchester," he mutters lowly, eyes lasering on him, brow taut. "I'm gonna give you a deal... I want you t' try somethin' for me, okay?" It's hesitant, slow, stiff, but Dean does provide him with a single nod. "A'right." </p><p>Benny now shifts slightly, resting his arms around Dean's waist, carefully drawing him in close to his chest. He heavily sighs, furrowing his brow somberly, taking in Dean's visage— those wide apple green eyes, goggling in anticipation; parted pink lips, slightly puffy from an aggressive display of affections and biting; small freckles scattered across his cheeks as though each were generously considered and placed... So precious. </p><p>His blue gaze pierces Dean as he continues. "Now, I can't force you t' do anythin'... but I'm puttin' this offer up, 'case you're int'rested." His own countenance relaxes and the corners of his mouth perk up just a tad. His voice drops when he speaks again, just above a whisper, husky. "I want you t' say... what I jus' said, back t' me...... mm?" His eyes briefly drop, but he goes, "...You say... 'I'm beautiful'..." Finding that alluring green again, he raises a brow as Dean knits his in bemusement. "Don't do it for me...... I want you t' say it... an' /hear/ yourself say it... And no—... no thinkin' 'bout any... any doubts you might feel, hearin' those words..." A pause. "...You just say it... an' watch me ev'ry time y' do." He squints as he goes on, voice tightening as he expresses the depth of what he means... what he wants Dean to feel. "Jus'... feel... what those words'll taste like on your tongue. Focus on me." His eyes wander, his voice creaking slightly as he muses, "Enjoy the ride... Heh. That's all y'gotta do. Two simple words." Another pause. "...You do that, Dean..." Benny cranes his neck so he can whisper to his ear. "...you do that, an' I might just give you a li'l reward...... an' not just the once, no, no..." He hums, "...ev'ry time— I mean, /ev'ry/ time you say it... I will give it to you......" </p><p>He shrugs as he pulls back, louder again. "Of course, ya don't have t' take me up on that. We'll continue on like b'fore. But..." He purrs, eyes flashing daringly— one might even say mischievously, "...iffen you're thinkin' that sounds like a mighty good idea, well..." He smirks, then tilts his head. "...I guess we'll just hafta see... won't we...?"</p><p>Dean stares, mind reeling over Benny's words. It's... ridiculous, what he's asking. But - it's not. Not to him. He just... he's looking at Dean with sincerity that aches and burns and friggin seems to GLOW in his face and his warm hands are on Dean's hips, thumb rubbing circles in his skin, and he's still - god, he's still just...inside Dean, and he wants this one thing. </p><p>The throaty purr of giving something every time Dean says the words makes excitement coil in Dean's stomach, anticipation skip up his spine. Even as his brows wrinkle in curiosity. He almost doesn't, almost scoffs some acerbic words instead. But, hell. This is Benny. Benny is asking him this out of all the goodness he has, and Dean...he doesn't want to disappoint.</p><p>But also, deep down in a place he doesn't go, he wants to feel beautiful. Wants to believe that. Wants to just...know. </p><p>"Okay," he whispers. "Okay, Benny. I..." Sucking in an enormous breath, looking into those sharp and warm and loving blue eyes, Dean croaks "... I - I'm beautiful."</p><p>Drawing a long, satiated sigh, Benny voice rumbles as the muscles in his legs tremble when they stir. That's right. You are. "There ya go..." he whispers instead, kissing the corner of Dean's mouth and resting a hand against his chest, unable to resist a couple of taps to where his heart is. His own bursts with something close to jubilation and, though he knows it's hard for Dean, pride surges through him as well. "That's good, sweetheart," he praises louder. Trailing his other arm up to wrap under the other's armpit, hand clamping hard on his shoulder, he starts to pull down in anticipation. It pains him, knowing how much Dean tears himself down despite being such a good man who tries and fights for all things and people. He never sees the good he does, only the bad... and he continuously berates himself over it. But not now, Benny internally demands. He wants— he NEEDS Dean to believe him, with every fiber of his being. And he'll be damn sure to pour every ounce of that feeling in everything he does. "Keep goin'..." So steadily rocking back his hips, with a pregnant pause in between, he bucks then... only this time, he digs.</p><p>"I'm -" Dean gasps, trying to handle what is happening, as his body thrills with how Benny holds him, how he's /possessing/ him. "I work really hard, and, uh -" swallowing "I'm - I'm a good cop." He almost winces at that, because he can't help but think it sounds stupid, and yet he's tingling with anticipation, hanging on the edge of what Benny is doing, and trying so desperately to see himself this way. </p><p>And careening across his eyes as Dean closes them is a flash of light as Benny bucks into him.</p><p>A small gleeful sound erupts from Benny as his expression turns bittersweet.</p><p>Ohh...... he hadn't expected that...</p><p>He just gave Dean two words, but for him to try... for him to say more... Benny instantly feels himself choking up, his grip crushing now as he scrunches up his brow and promptly ducks his face into Dean's shoulder to dispell that urge, instead just... focusing on him. On how amazing he feels, sounds, smells... He can't help it though. </p><p>He'd pray to every deity in existence to wrest that pain from deep within Dean's heart... that pain that obscures such a pure soul from thriving as it should. He swallows and sets himself again, thrusting wholeheartedly, and then again when Dean manages to squeak out those same two words once more.</p><p>Dean feels so much of everything Benny as he keeps saying those words and then tries for others, mind scrabbling and pinwheeling as Benny thrusts with abandon, the feeling of him exploding in Dean so that he very nearly screams with the pleasure and force of it, trying still to do what Benny asks.</p><p>With sweat beading and pouring down his face he gasps "I'm trying...to see myself - ah, Benny - to believe I'm - oh, god, worth... something..." His voice goes rough and catches high on a whine as he blurts those words.</p><p>"You... are, Dean," Benny rasps, shifting his head up to lay his jaw to his shoulder, continuing with smaller motions as Dean gathers his thoughts. "Ya don't need... t' matter t' ev'ry Tom, Dick, and H—arry..." Both of his hands explore his chest now, tweaking and then flicking his nipples before massaging them. Dean bends a bit with a whine and he follows, one hand abandoning him to help support them against the bed. "You're w—worth a damn... I promise you that." Licking his lips, he nods at him even though he can't see it. "Go on y' side for me, doll. I gotcha... Keep talkin' t' me."</p><p>Dean bends, he buckles, or would if he hadn't been lying pressed into pillows with his body throbbing and hot and his - he's on fire with feeling and sweat is coating his legs, thighs and knees as he hears Benny and nods, whimpers as he turns and flops onto his side, the other going with him, one leg wrapping around and over Dean's as his hips continue rolling, thrusting him into Dean as Dean closes his eyes and gasps "I am, I - try," presses himself to Benny with a yip as his hands grasp the other man's hairy wrists for a moment to find and keep purchase.</p><p>Benny groans in response, flush to Dean before he pulls out most of the way as he had before and replants himself with a loud grunt. He screws his eyes shut as well, pulse racing when he hears Dean's baritone pitch rise. "Ain't 'spectin' more from ya, Dean," he manages after a gulp of air. "Don't hafta... try so hard..." He lays kisses firmly to Dean's shoulder blades, practically willing them to embed into the skin there. And, though it aches a bit with the angle, he turns one of his hands around to allow Dean to hold it. "It's— enough—... You're enough."</p><p>That. At that, Dean's breath shudders out. He grips Benny's hand, and his eyes squeeze shut as he feels the peppering of kisses and that perfect, glorious thrust which makes him spill and spill, and then his head bows and he gasps on a wet sound, prickling in his eyes turning to tears that collect on his lashes and as he shudders, one starts to fall.</p><p>It doesn't take much long after for Benny to fall to pieces when he reaches his peak, sensitive as he rides his high out. He returns the squeeze of Dean's hand, twice, and breathlessly mumbles that he's pulling out prior to doing so— and even that too he's cautious with. Removing and tying off the condom to toss it onto the pile on the floor, he sits back up, only hunching over to encourage Dean to lay flat and just relax.</p><p>With a sharp intake of air, Dean hauls himself to rest on a pillow, roughly pushing the others aside and accidentally onto the floor. He doesn't care though, locking his arms around the pillow and pressing his face to it. He jolts a bit when he suddenly senses those familiar... safe... hands rubbing his back and massaging his muscles. Something in him stabs and he pays no mind to the way he sputters some spit in trying to hold back his tears.</p><p>"You doin' a'right, darlin'...?" Benny's cool bass washes over him— he nods in reply. He doesn't press, but Dean's sure he knows. Still, it does warm him that Benny's avoiding the subject, at least for right now. He just wants to enjoy this... please......</p><p>"You were amazing, Dean... Thank you." Benny imparts after a minute of silence.</p><p>With a broken shuddering sob, heart slowing as his muscles tremble and sweat drips down the insides of his legs, even as Dean violently releases the pillow and flips to practically fling himself onto Benny, in his arms, his own wrapping around Benny's neck and twining tightly, lips going right to press to the sweaty skin above Benny's collarbones. </p><p>As Dean kisses and licks, nuzzling his nose into the divot at the base of Benny's throat, curls of chest hair tickle the skin under rush of tears now cascading down Dean's face. </p><p>He feels almost ...flayed as he feels, and hears Benny's words. Sweet, sweet words… Dean clutches him, their body heat amplified by closeness, by Dean kicking one bare leg up to wrap around Benny's thigh. </p><p>Voice low and rough and utterly wrecked, he mutters, not even able to say 'you're welcome'  "You were - I'm - god, Benny." Dean almost finds it in himself to apologize for his tears, to snark out something deprecating about them, but the look in Benny's eyes and the assurance that he is beautiful and that he is worth something hits him all over again, making Dean tremble. He gasps on a whimper that turns into "I wanna keep - I wanna hold you," mumbled with presses of his lips onto Benny's chest and neck. He isn't even sure why he's asking as he's already hanging on, but hell. He whimpers again. "Lemme do that, please?"</p><p>Benny brushes his hand back and forth on Dean's back in reassurance. "I'm not goin' anywhere, sweetheart— not that I could if I wanted," he chuckles, swallowing to quench his dry throat. Tightening his own embrace and resting his forehead to the other's shoulder, he sighs. "How could I say no t' you...?" he whispers then, more of a remark than an actual question.</p><p>Dean chuckles. It's a broken sound, like the rest of hi -- no. It's just rough after all of this. Rough, like... how he feels. </p><p>His heart leaps and thuds at Benny's words and he buries himself into the other's body in an embrace, uttering a "thank you" fervid even as it is nigh inaudible.</p><p>"Always, Dean..." Benny supplies. "Always."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello there readers! This is a sort of prequel/teaser for another work Huhsuabee and I are writing together, an alternate universe with Dean as a police officer, Sam as an FBI agent, and a lot of others crop up. There will be laughter, tears, family drama - a TON of family drama - found family, pining, and all sorts of love. If you enjoy this and are interested in the idea, please let us know :)</p><p>Thank you and carry on</p></blockquote></div></div>
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